Welcome to Black, Gay, and Jewish-a personal blog dedicated to my journey of conversion to Judaism. I’ve been interested in Judaism, on some level, for quite some time. As a child, world religions fascinated me and as an adult, after much searching and researching, I found the source of all of the 3 major religions- Judaism. Learning has been fun, and as cliché as it sounds, I feel “home.”
I’m a writer and, “Black, Gay, and Jewish” is the memoir I am currently working on about this journey. Please make sure to read my other two blogs, OhioLezgirlinNYC and Small Space Gourmet to learn more about me.
If you want to send me an e-mail please do so at blackgayandjewish@gmail.com
Enjoy, come back often, and tell your friends.
Kol haKvod! May your journey be filled with blessings, warmth, friendship, wisdom, and love.
Thank you and welcome Stephanie!!
Hello Erika
Shavua Tov! Just discovered your blog and find it very informative. I converted in 2009 and continue to be excited about the journey. Kavod, keep going. You will be in my prayers.
TimahRuth Elisheva
Yay! Welcome to the blog. I’m so glad you like it and congrats on your conversion!
I just found this site and am so glad to find it and read it. I’ve been in the same Christmas situation you describe many times over the last 20 years. This year I came home to spend Christmas with my family. I was uncomfortable the entire time even saying to myself “you’re only observing, not participating”
I’m gay, 48, Jewish, doctorally degreed, and am now and Israeli Citizen. I’m not overtly religious though I am devoutly Jewish and Zionist (though not a zealot). My sister married Jewish, hardly keeps a Jewish home but is smart, she gets it, considers herself to be half Jewish and I feel comfortable with her and in her home. The problem I have is with my self-righteous, very uneducated born again dogmatically christian mother. The truth be told … I can’t stand her. I can’t stand being around her, or hearing her voice. I cant stand looking at her, knowing that I came out of her and I’m totally and utterly ashamed of her. She’s done nothing to learn about me, my gayness, my depression, my life, my Jewishness … nothing, an I resent her and all she so blindly and unintelligently believes in.
The birds are falling form the sky and the fish are dying. This has been in the news now for a week. Yesterday she starts telling me it’s a sign of the ends of time, the coming of Christ as quoted in “the bible” I tried to educate her. I told her that Revelations is not the bible, that the new testament is not the bible and that the bible, from an academic and any theological point of view constitutes the first five books of Moses. Its like talking to a grapefruit. This of course leads to heated yelling and nastiness, again. She is the reason I have lived on the opposite coast for over 20 years. I wish she wasn’t my mother.
I need help resolving the fact that like you and your sister, I hate my mother. How, how do I reconcile my disdain for my mother, her low level of intelligence, her blind christian faith, her inability to care to want to learn about me, Jews, the way we live, learn, and believe and the greater world around her.
I hate her and have for my entire adult life. I feel so very very alone. xoxox
Anthony
Hi Anthony,
Thanks for finding my blog and for reaching out. It’s hard. I’m not a therapist but I’m currently seeking one! It’s terrible for me to think of my sister in that way, especially because I only have one. She’s not bigoted or anything but the pain that she’s inflicted on my family and her children is so difficult to bare. I say hate because I cannot find the love any longer. What I feel has replaced what I felt because what I felt, the love I felt for her along with the expectations of what a sister should be has disappeared. Perhaps it will return but for now, the emotions I feel, however seemingly cruel, are how I feel. I’m praying for healing, not for her, but for me.